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Monday, May 19, 2014

Why Girls in Their Early 20's are Like Dogs.

While talking to one of my best friends about his girl situation (s) I realized how much girls in their early 20's are just like dogs. Guys wonder why their relationships aren't working out when they date early 20 somethings when they are in their 30's; hmmm.  You could say this goes for girls in general but late 20's-30 somethings don't really have much room to be picky; not to mention our energy to care enough is significantly lower. If you are going to date early 20 something girls...hope you are ready for a HUGE responsibility!

1) They need to be taken out at the very least once a day. Girls in their early 20's want to see and be seen!

2) They get REALLY excited when you come home. "'re back!!!!!" "Babe I went to Target....."

3) They have trouble controlling their bladder sometimes. Usually due to one too many vodka shots.

4) They need attention and if you are ignoring them, you better believe they will make their presence known.

5) They sleep a lot. Like A LOT.

6) You feel the urge to tell them to get up and do something with their lives but you know it's falling on deaf ears.

7) Their priorities are playing, drinking, eating, sleeping. In that order.

8) They like to cuddle when falling asleep. Ew.

9) They don't know they've done something wrong until you've rubbed their face in it.

10) They need a leash...and not in a kinky way. They will literally get lost if you don't hang on to them.

11) They go up to random strangers and make friends. Sometimes touch them inappropriately.......

12) You will probably need to bathe them at least once a month.

13) They bark at inopportune times...

14) Maybe even bite.

15) They will start to smell if you don't do something about it.

16) They respond to little cues like "You want to go bye-bye?" Or, "Is Katie hungry? (in baby voice) I know she is...I know she is!" Drool and spinning in circles ensues.

17) They DO NOT like other girl dogs. Bitches. (see what I did there ;) )

18) They love to stick their head out of the car window...probably to prevent puking.

19) They may attack at any moment.

20) They leave surprises for you....and not the good kind.

If they get too crunk, just put em down...


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